XD Awesome Song!

This song made me laugh. So yeah Take your friends and go see what you can fin at the thrift store *amused*

Social Acceptance

Accepting people for who and what they are can be a very difficult thing. It's a very scary thing to realize that you're the outsider and that there isn't a place for you. That's how I feel lately. I'm from the outside, and don't belong here. I think  that it's something that's supposed to fade over time. But does it really?

There are a lot of things that make people different. We each have our own unique sets of experiences that influence the way that we interact with the world. It's not just how we look, or what we wear. It's how we present ourselves. We have a lot to offer to the world when it comes to the way we interpret our experiences. What we've seen and done can help others to understand what it is that they're going through.

But there are so many hurdles that are put up in order to keep people away from us. We don't like strangers, we don't like things that we don't understand, and we fear change. I am not sure what to think as I'm trying to fit into the new place that I find myself in. But it's not as easy as just changing clothes or cutting my hair. Trust me, if it really was as easy as cutting all of my hair off then that's what I would do.

But to earn Social Acceptance means trying to jump through hoops that other people are putting up. People tend to expect them to be leapt through without telling you what they are. Which leaves people grasping at straws. There are many things that people can do, but we can't read other peoples minds. At least, not reliably.

Socially, it's scary when trying to be accepted. But there is nothing that there is that can make it any easier. We can try to offer what we have, or we can shut ourselves off. There aren't clear ways to do these things. Why? Because there is no right or wrong answer.

I'm frustrated. I'm scared, I'm sad, and am lonely. All in all it leaves me feeling kind of depressed and hopeless. But...It doesn't really matter. None of these feelings are going to help me find an sort of acceptance here at all. But I guess that it doesn't really matter. Why?

Because in the long run it isn't going to change anything. What I feel doesn't change the social hierarchy of the place I've entered. What I want to do, what I think might fix something, doesn't matter. I can't fix things if other people want to see me fail. I don't know what I want right now, but I'm tired.

I'm so tired already.

Backyard Safari : Lizard (1)

Alright so this is the lizard that was seen in the backyard. It kind of looks like a little Alligator.   After comparing the images that I took of it with a few different pictures of other lizards that can be found in the area, I think I've managed to identify it. I think it is a sagebrush lizard. If you look at the link below they have their own images and video footage of various examples of them.

http://www.californiaherps.com/lizards/pages/s.g.vandenburgianus.html

You can compare it to the video that I took if you like. *points below at her own video* Though I will warn you ahead of time that the video is very shaky.

Hole In The Wall (1)

A good story isn't decided by the author. But I do hope that you will enjoy reading Hole In The Wall as it is written. Eventually am hoping that you will think it is a good story. There may be some changes to it made over time, but for the time being, I hope that you enjoy it for what it is. If I do make any changes to it in the future, I will make sure to note the dates that there were updates to it made at the bottom of the page.

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Chapter 1. Hole In The Wall

There was a small hole in the wall, down in the corner, where the wooden molding didn’t meet properly. Something had chewed through the wall years ago, and it had never really been covered up or sealed. In fact no one had ever even noticed it. A small dresser had been standing there for years hiding it from view, but now as the house was emptied, the hole in the wall was the only thing in the room. It was a nice hole, with an arching top, the bottom flat along the floor boards. Dark shadows beyond it hiding the secrets of what was inside.

But the movers didn’t care; their job was to move out all the furniture. And once the room was bare save for the worn crimson carpet, they pulled the shade down over the small window of the room to keep prying eyes out. After the rest of the rooms on the second floor of the little house were empty, a saleswoman moved through each room. She made sure every shade was down, and pulled each door shut.

The only open thing in the house after they left was the hole in the wall. A silence fell inside the house, and darkness fell outside the little house. As the hours passed the small building shifted its aching timbers slightly, almost as though sighing and missing what had been within its walls. But the little hole was still there. While some may think a hole is nothing, to some such things can be the world.

This is where our story begins. In that empty room, with the door closed tight and the old worn shade pulled down keeping out even the small curious eyes of the stars. As the house sighed, something within its walls stirred. And had anyone been in that room where the little hole was, they would not have believed their eyes.  For as midnight drew near, sounds started to pour from the little hole.

Sad forlorn music came from within the walls of the little house; almost as though the house itself was weeping. While the music played small things crept from within the walls and started to gather on the now empty carpet. These things were quiet as they gathered on the carpet, until the music stopped. Then there was a small uproar that would have woken most. But since there were no people in the house, the things were not afraid of waking them.

You see, the hole in the wall had once been the home of a mouse. But the mouse had turned his residence over to a small goblin before he passed away. And as goblins go, it is unusual that one would want to live within a house. But this little goblin was not your garden variety goblin. He only stood 3 inches tall. This meant he was not big enough for most things goblins are expected to do. So he took over residency in the little hole that at the time had been behind a dresser.

Goblins, similar to the other fairy tale creatures, tend to live a very long time. They don’t worry about dying or change, and they find amusement in the actions of humans. This goblin was worried though. And he stopped playing his sad music and went out of the hole to great his entourage. His large dark eyes which could see very well in the dark, had tears in the corners as he viewed his worried companions.

There was a small doll. She had once been quite beautiful, and very loved by a little girl who had lived in the house many years ago. But her small porcelain face had been cracked, and she was forced to hide. The goblin rescued her, and she had joined him in the little hole. She had been the first companion. Time had not been kind to her, her curls that once had been shining gold, were now dusty and braided with cobwebs. But the goblin didn’t care, for he could still the beauty there.

There was a small felted pony, which was missing one hoof. A plush rabbit that was missing an eye, and a handful of plastic soldiers and Indians that had seen better days. There were many others, and all together, including the goblin their number was thirty. They had all joined the goblin over the years that passed since he had taken over residency from Mr. Mouse. The goblin smoothed his tattered coat as the toys shifted in the new uncertainty of the empty house.

“The house has never been truly empty before.” The Goblin finally said. His voice was low and sadness was etched into the edges of his words. “We are here still, so it is not as empty as it could be, but it is empty. I do not know if we will be safe without the people here in the house.”

“I don’t think we need to worry.” The doll responded, her painted blue eyes coated with dirt, marring her vision. Some people say they cannot see clearly a situation, the doll, certainly was having trouble seeing things for what they were. “People are not always kind, you know.” She added, one small porcelain hand moving to cover the crack that ran from her eye down along her neck. “They can be careless and hurt us.”

The other toys murmured in agreement with the doll. She was their leader whenever the goblin was away. But he was not happy with their quickness to judge their circumstances.

“This is not Toyland.” He said bitterly. “We are not safe without people here. Humans tend to tear down old houses when there is no one living in them any longer.” He crosses his skinny arms, long fingers tapping his elbows agitatedly as he waited for the meaning of his words to become realized by the toys.

The toys all shifted anxiously. They had not thought about the possibility that the little house which was their sanctuary might be destroyed. People are after all, as they all knew from experience, fickle things. They will love you until you are broken or hurt, and then they will throw you aside.  The toys had never thought about people doing such things with houses. A cry of distress came from the felted pony, and soon moved through the other toys, many of whom fell over.

“What are we to do? I don’t know if any of us could make it to Toyland in the state that we are in!” The pony shifted, limping some. “Even if we tried, we might be taken up as refuse, and thrown away into oblivion.” He shifted shaking his half bare mane worriedly, the thin tail behind him swishing.

“I said nothing about going to Toyland yet.” The goblin interrupted, a hand moving to rake through his thick yarn like hair. He usually kept it tied up in some fashion, but today it was loose. He had been watching through cracks in the walls as the movers had worked during the day. “I have heard tell of a toy doctor.” He offered the words quietly, large round eyes watching the crowd to see how they reacted.

“Toy Doctors are nothing but children! And children are more likely to break us than fix us!” The Doll retorted.

“I think you could be wrong Mabel. This person is a grownup. She mends toys, and repairs them. I have heard from some that she helps find homes for homeless toys once they’ve been repaired.” His words were measured and he took a step back as a murmur started going through the toys.

“I could help each of you get to her. That is if it is what you wish.” The goblin shifted almost anxiously, his bare feet shifting through the carpet.

The toys discussed the information amongst themselves. Many of them were very worried about the idea. Change was not something some of them were certain about. Many of them were under the impression they could never be repaired. But finally Mabel came forward.

“If you really believe that there is such thing as a toy doctor, I will volunteer to go to her first. As I have been with you the longest, it is in good will that I volunteer.” Mabel sighed, a small cloud of dust moving from within her as she did so. “But you will promise to take care of all the others, and pass them information as we go.”

The goblin nodded. “I agree to the terms. But you all will need to be prepared for the journey. Leaving our home is not going to be an easy task.” He paused, tucking his hands into his pockets as he leaned down to look at the worn carpet intently. “Those that would rather be moved to Toyland, I will gladly aid you in that endeavor as well.”

Storytime : Peter Pan (1)

Today we're going to start reading Peter Pan.  This book was written by J.M. Barrie, and has been made into a variety of movies and a few different plays. But the key thing that you need to know about this is that each presentation of him twists the story some. Unless you read the story, you don't know the real Peter. So we will introduce you.

But yeah. This is a story that I haven't started reading on my own since my grandmother passed away. I had tucked it away out of sight. But i brought it with me... and decided I may as well try reading it again and that maybe you would like to share it with me.

I miss you guys a lot.

Story Time?

So I've been rolling a thought around in my head for a bit, and I've decided that there's no reason not to follow through with it. I know that some of the people reading this know who I am and where I am. And that is alright, and good. Story time though is something that everyone should be able to enjoy.

http://www.storylineonline.net/

http://resources.woodlands-junior.kent.sch.uk/interactive/onlinestory.htm

so here's two links to things online to check out for now. they're neat. But keep an eye open... things should be getting interesting around here soon.

Happy Valentines Day!

So it's another holiday am not sure I like. But since I missed posting for mardi gras, I may as well post for you today. Yes I have an amusing valentine that i saw at the store to post for you, ready? here it comes.....

There we go.... It amused me because it is a bit of a furry one... and who would have thought to put big foot on a valentine XD.... on top of that WHO thought to use beef jerky as a valentine? It's cute and amusing on an odd silly level, but that's ok.

Here's more piggies! I'm not really a piggy bank collector, but they're interesting to look at. Personally I prefer rubber duckies. But I haven't really gotten around to finding some interesting ones to post pictures of for you. But then again, who knows what I might find to post for you!

Traveling 2/13

So today has been a very long day for me already. We left the house around 3:30 AM and I was checked in and through security by 4:30 AM. I had to throw a few things away out of my suitcase, but... it could have been worse I suppose. I keep reminding myself that it's just stuff. It isn't like I can't get new stuff. But I like my old familiar stuff. I know what it is and I know what I have...er, rather I know what I had.

It was  really nice to see almost everyone yesterday before I left. I know that there are some people that I didn't get a chance to see before I left this morning. But no worries! I will be back eventually. You all know I'm like a weed, my roots go deep and I always come back... it may take a bit of time but I rarely go away for long.

Cayden made me a neat play dough man who's been keeping me company at the airports. He's still a little squishy but am guessing he will harden up some as time goes by. Which is good I suppose. There's a little boy here at the airport in Minnesota and he has on the same monster pajamas that Gavin has. Phi wanted to see a Moose. *points below* Best I can do hun. But maybe once I get to Cali there will be some more interesting things that I can post pictures of.

Anyway. I still have a long flight from here to San Diego. Not that it's a bad thing. Am just very very very tired ~_~. Plus I feel achy and my shoulders hurt. I really should have thought out my packing better. Meh, lesson learned a little bit too late. But yeah, am on my way. Things are new, and there's going to be a lot to do and figure out. But for now... I just have to wait out the day as I travel. It's tiresome, tedious and frustrating. But it's ok, it is really really ok. I have things to look forward to, as well as worry about. But yes. A bit longer before I actually get to San Diego. But at least you have this update for now.

6 days!

Ok! So here's the scoop for those of our readers that don't know this. I'm getting out of Buffalo on the 13th, bright and early in the morning. Tonight we're hoping to make it over to the VFW Post for Moe's Karaoke. But so far it's not a certainty, but am hoping to see a few people there.

This also means if you wanted to say bai bai, this is a good time to do so. Other than that you're going to hafta wait until I get back to Buffalo in October for Wedding/Halloween Season. I don't really know how long I'm going to be around then though. But That is going to eb the next time I should be around, UNLESS something horribly awful happens, But I don't really want to think of bad things happen.

ANYWAY I know that I've been offline for a few days (and I have a few more days of being offline left before I get back online). Honestly there isn't a lot to be said It's just going to be warmer out there, and there's going to be a lot of stuff that I'm going to need to relearn and do. I'm going to hafta find new things to do for entertainment, and a few new folk to go out to Karaoke with.

Alright, If you need me you know how to get a hold of me, otherwise drop me a message here and I will try to get back to you as soon as I can.

Much Love and Best Wishes.

Spycat!

Testing out how to post from my phone, and introducing my kitten at the same time!

A Little Hungry?

Poor Ludo!